Ah, Christmas. Wood fires, eggnog, twinkling lights and carols. Mulled wine, mulled cider, pigs in blankets, Christmas sandwiches. Expanding waist lines, cheeseboard guilt and crippling hangovers. And then, ladies and gentlemen, I give you: New Year’s Eve. They say there is no magic cure for the morning after the night before, but I’m here to reveal the best ways to try.

First and foremost: breakfast. Although no scientist has proven that scrambled eggs and smoked salmon help with hangovers, it certainly won’t make it worse – as long as you do it in style. Head to one of London’s top hotels for a fry up – The Ritz offers a poached haddock and champagne sauce breakfast – hair of the dog anyone?

For those suffering at the extreme end of the hangover scale, there will be no question of leaving the house. You’ll need a quick fix remedy that can be pulled directly from your kitchen shelves: a health boosting, hangover destroying smoothie. Granted, you may need to have shopped for some ingredients previously (who has acai powder just lying around?) but once they’re in the house they’ll last forever.  The most celebrated recipe is for a green smoothie, like this once from Udo’s Choice. Beyond Greens from Udo’s Choice is packed with the finest green foods, phytonutrients, detoxifying B vitamins and essential fatty acids. It helps your body break down and absorb the alcohol in your system and restores the vitamins and nutrients lost the night before.  

The Ultimate Green Smoothie:

• 300ml coconut water
• 1 ripe banana
• 100g blueberries
• Handful of spinach
• 1 teaspoon of Beyond Greens supplement from Udo’s Choice
• 1 tablespoon Ultimate Oil Blend
• 1 tablespoon nut butter
• Lemon juice

If pure ease is the order of the day and the sound of a Nutribullet will only make things worse, try a Milk Thistle supplement. This natural remedy is made from the stem of the milk thistle plant, a unexceptional weed with exceptional nutritional benefits, including reducing effects of hangovers when taken before or after drinking. Alternatively, Japanese health guru Hideo Nakayama launched Sun Chlorella 40 years ago, providing supplements that have been shown to prevent hangovers by up to 96 per cent if taken before drinking. Containing iron, folic acid and B vitamins, the supplements are energy-boosting and ease an irritated gut. Enough said.

During the party season, time is of the essence. You may need a quick fix before work or another event and the more subtle effects of a supplement just won’t cut it. Meet Dr Burke, hangover aficionado and king of the IV drip. Dr Burke’s licensed practitioners can treat you with a drip in your hotel room, your home or they send a free shuttle to collect you. Yes, he’s based in Las Vegas, far from your own hangover hell, but it gives you an idea of quite how effective this treatment can be. Head to Harley Street for a range of reassuringly expensive treatments.

In our quest for cures we’ve fried, whizzed, ingested and injected. And now to brewing: coffee, but not your average bean. Kopi Luwak is the most luxurious coffee in the world due to its unusual origin. The beans are eaten and digested by civets, an Indonesian cat-like animal, and the results are collected for your delectation. Despite, or perhaps due to, its unappealing history, civet coffee is incredibly expensive with a cup costing between $35 – $100. Whether its Kopi Luwak or a Starbucks flat white, a caffeine hit always helps.

During my extensive research, it has become apparent that the only guaranteed path to a clear head come New Year’s Day is stone-cold sobriety. So, Merry Christmas one and all and happy hangovers. I’m off the pub.